


Ten Times the Commander Fell for His Inquisitor (Even If He Didn't Notice)

by ariannadi



Series: Other Tidbits [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Cullen's Perspective on his lady friend, F/M, Fluff, Romance, implied sexy times at one part
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-11
Updated: 2015-03-11
Packaged: 2018-03-17 10:32:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3525980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ariannadi/pseuds/ariannadi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Without really knowing it, the charming elf had wormed her way into his heart. And yet he wondered exactly when it had started, or if it had been this way all along."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ten Times the Commander Fell for His Inquisitor (Even If He Didn't Notice)

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little something I thought up on what Cullen feels during the key moments between his and Arian's relationship :)
> 
> Question? Concern? My tumblr: [here](http://www.martini-september.tumblr.com)

The first time he saw her, he didn't think much of it.

Upon the outburst of commotion that started as soon as Cassandra and the others had returned from the head of the breach - now closed, Cullen took a moment to step away from his recruits and head to Haven's main gate to see for himself what was going on. A couple of the soldiers that had gone with the Seeker followed behind her as she attempted to clear a path amidst the growing body of curious people. Upon further examination, the Commander noticed that they were carrying someone, a limp body that hung loosely between their grasps.

When he asked what had happened, Cassandra had briefed him on the breach, the mark, and the person in question. Although hard to take in all at once, the fact that they actually had someone to close the tears in the Fade throughout Thedas relieved him, causing him to take a note on his mental checklist on one thing they didn't need to worry about _as_ much.

As Cassandra and the soldiers holding the person continued to move through the crowd, Cullen's eyes fell on the unconscious individual for all but a minute. In that time however, he gathered just enough information to see exactly what they had inherited into the Inquisition - a Dalish Elf, possibly a foot shorter than he, with hair the color of bleached wheat and a pale blue design in the shape of a moth on her forehead and chin.

 

* * *

 

Their second interaction, or initial, if you count the fact that they didn't exactly _speak_ when he first saw her, was a few days after she had awoken from her comatose state.

He found her sitting outside of the Chantry, as she had just returned from the Hinterlands in order to claim more areas for the Inquisition with Cassandra. When she had originally come to, he learned her name, Arian Lavellan of Clan Lavellan in northern Ferelden. He also learned that she was a natural hunter, which wasn't surprising considering her lithe build and heritage. Among these two things, he finally learned that she liked to be alone, as this wasn't the first time he had seen her wandering around Haven without company.

When she saw him walking toward her, she gave a small smile in recognition that made his own lips quirk up slightly. He asked why she was sitting alone, to which she replied that she needed to take a breather from the sudden attention she had enraptured. He couldn't blame her; to go from being a solo convict to the entity of a goddess herself in the matter of a week was no doubt overwhelming. Taking a seat next to her, he then asked how she felt about the Inquisition. Although a bit hesitant, she replied that she was still wary of the entire situation. People didn't exactly trust her kind, and even being the Herald had provided gossip on how Andraste's chosen could be an elf of all things.

He understood how she felt, more so than he was able to explain. He himself had come from a questionable background - transitioning from a templar who obeyed orders like a loyal hound to Commander of an entire organization in less than a year. They were both outcasts in their origins at this point, now plotted into a situation that didn't exactly provide a promising conclusion. Still, he offered her reassurance, telling her with a soft smile that he had faith in her, that all the Advisors did, and that if she ever needed advice to never be afraid to ask.

The grin that reached her bright indigo eyes in response to his words swiftly touched a deeper part of his being.

 

* * *

 

He was terrified, and he didn't even understand why.

It wasn't like he didn't have faith in Arian, she had more than proven herself at this point. And yet when Corypheus had decided to attack Haven and she had offered to stay behind to ensure he wouldn't follow the organization through the hidden pass in the mountains, Cullen could only hold his breath in fear of what would happen to her. They had made it a few miles past Haven, and now had set up camp behind a foothill that provided both shelter and seclusion from Corypheus and his followers. The Commander had fired the arrow into the sky to alert the Herald that they had made it safely out of Haven, and at this point it had been almost a day since. Every troupe of soldiers that had been sent out to find Arian had returned empty-handed so far, to both his and Cassandra's chagrin.

At one point, the Seeker had decided she had had enough and asked him to come with her to locate the missing elf herself. He offered no protest as he followed her and a few soldiers up the same trail they had previously trekked. The weather had become brutal, a flurry of snow and wind nearly knocking them over more than once. His heart clenched at the thought of Arian being trapped in this, and all alone at that. Pushing his ominousness aside with the shake of his head, he and the others continued to march forward.

It was when they saw a distant body warily moving toward them that Cullen didn't even realize his feet were moving at a much quicker rate. The elf saw them and her paled face immediately flooded with relief as she fell on her knees into the white blanket below her. The Commander swiftly approached her and knelt down, scooping her into his arms and enveloping her in his cloak. After checking over her bruised body the group began heading back to the camp, and the entirety of the journey Cullen watched Arian's face with uncertainty, silently praying to the Maker that she would survive through the night.

 

* * *

 

Skyhold proved to be the housing that the Inquisition could only dream of.

Quickly everyone had settled into routine, with work on parts of the castle going underway in the matter of minutes upon their arrival. Cullen had taken it upon himself to claim a tower to the right of the main hall, setting up a small office and loft in the lower and upper levels, respectively. His troops had become far more enthusiastic about serving the Inquisition as of late, which he in part credited Arian to considering her recent acceptance of the position of Inquisitor. When she had visited him while he had been set up in the courtyard shortly after they arrived, he had confided this in her, as well as the fact that he had been worried about her fate in Haven - though not in so many _exact_ words. He swallowed roughly when he began to understand why, the thoughts coming into his head whenever he saw her gracefully walking along the battlements or kneeling down to inspect a flower in the garden. Without really knowing it, the charming elf had wormed her way into his heart. And yet he wondered exactly when it had started, or if it had been this way all along.

It took all of his willpower to remind himself that now wasn't the time for such things. They had an Inquisition to worry about, and she now towered over him by leaps and bounds in power and status. To try to form something between them, it would no doubt be looked down upon, and discouraged by most.

And yet the soft look she would give him when he caught her eye at the war table only tugged at his already questioning heartstrings.

 

* * *

 

It was difficult to explain how he felt, when she had revealed that she returned his affections.

He was surprised, for one. To know that the person he cared for in such a specific way felt the same came as a shock initially. It wasn't like it wasn't possible, but he never expected someone like her - so soft and kind to everyone she came in contact with to grow attracted to his stubborn and determined behavior. Still, here they were alone on the battlements, himself stuttering like a bashful fool as he tried to explain his doubts. Maker be praised that none of his soldiers saw him in such a state.

Cullen then discovered that he could consider murdering someone in a split second when one of his recruits interrupted the kiss he was about to place on her lips.

Although he was embarrassed that something could put a halt in such a defining moment, Arian herself was mortified, turning away from him shyly the second the soldier approached them. After a harsh glare that spoke more words than the Commander could possibly emit, the recruit quickly scuttled into the fortress once more. Turning back to Arian, Cullen watched as she attempted to relieve him of her presence, before something took over him and he cupped her cheeks, planting a tender and needy kiss on her lips. He could feel her initial surprise, her hands wavering at his sides as she tried to find a spot to place them. Eventually they settled on his hips, bringing him closer to her.

When they parted he uttered a flushed apology, watching her eyes carefully as she stared at him for a moment. The Inquisitor's face then broke into a wide smile as she sweetly replied that his timing had been perfect. He could only chuckle as he leaned in once more, claiming her lips with a bit more softness this time.

 

* * *

 

 He knew the consequences of giving up lyrium, he had seen it firsthand with a number of templars who had tried to squash their addiction.

This didn't stop him when he had decided to lay it off months prior. He wanted to function as a normal man, he wanted to be free of the life he had previously led, even if it meant suffering from the lash-back of his body screaming for more. More and more often the nightmares came, and with them hundreds of memories that began to resurface from the ghosts of his troubled past. He wanted to believe that he could lead the Inquisition's army, that he could try to live as normally as fate allowed him, but the thoughts hindered him in doubt, and it was with a heavy heart that he told Cassandra to relieve him of his service.

She had refused of course, he figured she would. He tried to explain himself, but she didn't back down no matter the excuse. It was then that Arian had walked in on their conversation and Cullen had frozen mid-sentence, excusing himself from the two women hastily, but not before uttering a quiet apology to his beloved.

A few minutes later, he was back in his office, glaring down at an open lyrium kit sitting idly on his desk. Fury suddenly came over him in that moment as he grabbed the kit and roughly flung it at the wall by the door, causing the contents to shatter as they hit the stone floor. Looking up from his desk, the Commander's breath hitched when he saw Arian standing there in the entryway, her hands drawn up to her face in defense. In horror he apologized but she just brushed it off, asking if _he_ was okay instead. This angered him, despite his better judgment. He didn't deserve sympathy, not even from her.

He explained then what was driving him mad, all of the things he had seen in his short lifetime, all of the memories that brought out the deepest fears of his being. The Commander suddenly found himself pacing the room, muttering to himself that the Inquisition would see as much attention from him as the Chantry had at one time. While he ranted to both himself and her, Arian stood and listened patiently, like a mother dove tending to her squawking chicks. It was when he finally had admitted to himself that lyrium would help that she had spoken, asking him if it was what he truly wanted.

After a period of silence, a bitter "no" escaped his lips. His Inquisitor carefully grasped his shoulder then, steadying him, and told him with stern eyes that he _could_ overcome it all. It was there that a new-found respect for her blossomed within.

 

* * *

 

 

Cullen despised nobility; he had never seen the purpose of parading around in expensive wear and chiding everyone about how unfortunate they were in comparison.

So when Leliana and Josephine had insisted he attend the Orlesian Ball at the Winter Palace, the only response that sufficed was a groan. He knew he would need to attend anyway, to keep the soldiers that were ready to jump into formation on his command at standby, but he hadn't anticipated getting dressed up or having to converse with the other attendants. And yet here he stood in the corner of the ballroom, negating to every woman who approached him if he would join them in a dance. At one point a nobleman had come up to him and asked if he was married yet, which in turn prompted him to scan the expansive room for Arian, who had not yet appeared to introduce herself to Empress Celene. Apparently Josephine had taken her aside before he and the others had arrived, something about dressing and dolling her up to the Orlesian standard. He could only imagine with a faint grin the poor elf sitting in a chair while Josie poked and prodded her with cosmetics.

When they finally announced her name to the court, Cullen's eyes flew to the staircase that she would soon transcend. He suddenly felt his heart skip a beat when his gaze landed on her.

She was dressed in a flowing lilac gown, and her normally tied up hair fell loosely in waves over her shoulders. The faintest bit of makeup had been applied to her lips and cheeks, accentuating her natural beauty just a degree more. He smirked to himself when he heard the mutterings of the crowd around him, all expressing how beautiful she was and how her grace matched that only of the Empress herself. _She's mine_ , his thoughts silently told them, _you'd only be so lucky to have her_.

Later, when the Grand Duchess' plot to murder Celene had been uncovered, the Commander found his Inquisitor standing out on a balcony overlooking the courtyard, alone. She was obviously distraught, her demeanor spoke measures about the night she had. Although he wasn't sure about his footwork, he silently took her hand in his with a smile and pulled her to the center of the alcove, and suddenly she was beaming. Their dancing was anything but smooth thanks to him, but it was all worthwhile when she laid her head on his shoulder, nuzzling her nose lovingly into his neck.

 

* * *

 

 

His heart was pounding, and he was sure that she could feel it from where she lay sprawled on his chest.

If it bothered her, she hadn't complained. Instead she stared at him through thick lashes, a lazy yet satisfied smile on her cheeks. After a humorous attempt to be intimate on his desk, they had found their way up into his loft and were now reveling silently in the aftermath of their coupling, the faint glow of the candle on his nightstand being their only source of light. Cullen hadn't thought it possible to feel this happy, he never had in his lifetime. Whenever he looked away from her only for his eyes to return to her own, his heart erupted into the drumbeat of an army marching to war. He had pondered this feeling previously, but now he could confirm it with his heart and soul.

He was in love with her.

Cullen smiled when she turned her head and began planting soft kisses along his breast, humming slightly as she pecked his skin. Slowly she dragged her naked body up his own, a shiver of delight travelling down his spine in response. When she was directly above him, Arian leaned forward and brushed her lips against his, causing him to chuckle as he cupped the back of her head and tenderly deepened the kiss. The floral scent of her hair wafted through his nostrils as her silken locks curtained their faces, and the warm softness of her body molded with his own like the missing piece of a puzzle. She was perfect to him in every way possible, and as they came together for the third time that night he realized that they were no longer titles to the public; no longer Inquisitor and Commander, no longer Dalish Elf and Ex-Templar, but a man and a woman sharing something passionate and exclusive only to one another.

Whatever turmoil lay beyond the walls of Skyhold, it went temporarily forgotten for the span of those hours.

 

* * *

 

 

When he saw her return victoriously with her band of heretics, the Commander's heart soared.

He was proud of her, although "proud" couldn't exactly cut it for the feeling that rushed through him as she and the others approached he and the other two Advisors. Corypheus had been defeated, the world was now a little less chaotic, and she was the beacon to a new beginning for them all. He was honored to be the Commander of her cause, and honored that of all people he was the one that she confided in, the one that she would turn to for comfort and love a midst everything. As soon as she stood in front of him, he bowed to her though she were Andraste herself, and immediately after embraced her for all to see. She was his, and forevermore would be. If the world decided to take her away from him now, Maker only knew what would happen to him and how he would respond.

The aftermath of her return saw the entirety of Skyhold celebrating, rounds of food and drink being passed here and there, and the Inquisitor and her accomplices making rounds themselves through the main hall to share stories of their success, which were twisted to legends in the matter of minutes. 

Cullen kept quiet while Arian socialized with practically everyone, watching her with a smile as she toasted drinks to strangers and laughed heartily with reddened cheeks. Somehow their eyes always managed to find one another through the crowd though, and the little glances and smirks she spared him between conversations said enough. Although the people had her now, later she would be entirely his. No one knew what the future held from here, but whatever happened, he only knew he wanted to be by her side.

 

* * *

 

 

Cullen knew that he loved Arian. When _exactly_ he had fallen in love with her though was up for debate.

Perhaps it was when he saw her sitting alone outside the Chantry in Haven, perhaps it was when he had first kissed her that day on the battlements, he couldn't really tell. Some deeper part of him wanted to say it was the moment he first saw her being carried by the soldiers, unconscious. After he had fallen though, he didn't really think it was possible to do so again. But he was wrong. So very, very wrong. In the span of a day, he had fallen for her again, and he had fallen for someone completely new as well.

Bending over slightly, the Commander kissed his Inquisitor's forehead, which was reddened and sweaty with tendrils of hair. She smiled at him lovingly, rolling out her shoulders then as she turned her eyes downward to the small bundle in her arms. It had certainly been a long day for them all, with Cullen nearly wearing the floor down with his nervous pacing as Arian underwent roughly twelve hours of labor. To them both though, it had been worth it when their son had finally arrived, squalling with the intensity only a newborn could possess. He had curly wisps of hair - dark at the moment but the midwife guaranteed it would fall out, and bright blue eyes like his mother's. The moment Cullen had burst through the doors to see them both, the child had enamored him entirely. He didn't know what he was going to experience being a father, but seeing the baby cuddle up to his mother and herself cooing the infant to sleep, all he knew was that he looked forward to it wholeheartedly.

Eventually she dozed off as well, the baby laying on her chest with drool trailing out of his mouth. As much as the Commander wanted to join them, there were reports that still needed to be finished, as he had abandoned them the moment Arian's water broke. As he stood and began to leave the room, he looked over his shoulder at them both and smiled, his heart full to bursting. 

He certainly wasn't expecting to find love in the Inquisition, but he had no complaints whatsoever.

 


End file.
